Today's Q. of the D. comes to us courtesy of the lovely tazcat: If you could return to any time in your life, either because it was an incredible time that you'd like to relive, or a time when you wish you could have done something differently, where would you go, and what would you do?
I hope I don't end up being the only one to answer this one. SMILE! I figured though that since it was my question I really should answer it. So ...
There are probably many times in my life that I wish I could go back to and do things differently, like the time in high school when I threw a little wimpy guy up against a counter because he called me a name when I was having a bad day; (I did feel really bad later and appologized to him for what I'd done), or when I told a good friend that I didn't want any contact anymore because he was doing drugs, rather than actually trying to talk to him instead. But, if I started wanting to change things I'd be a very busy person. So, now I'm trying to figure out a time that I'd like to go back to because it was incredible. I think that would have been the summer I was 13. I was at the Wisconsin Lion's Camp for two weeks in July, and I got to see a lot of people that I ordinarily didn't get to see. It was the summer between my seventh and eighth grade years, and seventh grade ended on a bad note so I was really truly scared of going back in the fall. After the first week of camp, a new girl was moved into our cabin. I was told ahead of time that she was really shy and that she probably wouldn't talk to us much. So, I pictured this really quiet, timid kid walking in, and the person that actually came in was absolutely nothing like that. She and I hit it off pretty much right away, and we still have an incredible friendship today. But, the part I wish I could do again happened on the last night of camp. Our group had formed a really close bond over the two weeks, and we were all really not looking forward to going back to our homes. My counselor, Sheri, was really a great person, and the counselor for the guy's cabin that we were paired up with, Doug, was also really amazing. So, the last night of camp, we all went to bed as usual, but Sheri woke us up at midnight. She got us all up and we went down to the lake. I think they built a fire and we were all kind of sitting around talking and just being together. Then we split up into groups and went canoeing around the lake. I was really having a hard time that night, partly because of the fact that I was going to be leaving my friends, and partly because the end of camp meant that I was that much closer to going back to school, and the absolute terror of that was something I couldn't then, and still can't now, really begin to express. I can't really explain everything the way I'd like to, because I just can't do it justice, but being with all those people, the peacefulness of the surroundings both on and off the water, and the fact that, for one of the first times in my life, I felt truly accepted by others, without being singled out as being different from everyone else gave me this incredible feeling of peace. After it was all over, I ended up walking back to the cabin with Sheri. She gave me some advice that night, and I still think about it sometimes. She basically told me that I didn't always have to be tough and "strong", and that it was okay to let people get close to me, even if it meant getting hurt once in a while. I lost touch with Sheri several years ago, but I often wonder what ever happened to her. She is only about 7 or 8 years older than me, but at thirteen, twenty or twenty-one seems like a long way off. I wish I could talk to Sheri now, and tell her how much that summer, that night, and our private conversation, meant to me.
Wow, I can relate to so much of that. sometime I'm going to have to go through and answer all the questions of the day myself. Thanks for sharing all that.
Yeah. I was thinking that it'd be interesting to see how you'd answer your own questions. SMILE! I'd love to see your answer to this one though if you're willing.
Well, my life is full of things I'd change if given the chance. A lot of misunderstandings that would have been so easy to clear up. One example was in high school. I had been working up the nerve for a year to ask a certain girl to the Christmas banquet. So I finally did, and she told me she was busy that evening. I've no doubt that she was. But after a year's build-up, the disappointment must really have shown on my face, and she seems to have taken it as anger. I wasn't angry with her at all, I still wanted to go out with her. But we've never spoken again. There are a lot of moments in my life that sort of stick out that way, but that one is the most prominent.
As for the good times I'd like to relive, there are so many. The one that sticks out the most is a trip my parents and I took to Alberta in, I guess, 1982. It was a wonderful opportunity to get closer to both of them. I remember taking a shower and getting the curtain not quite right, making a huge mess in the bathroom. My dad took me away fromt he hotel before my mom killed me, and we went for a walk in a local park. To this day I'm surprised that we found a park in Saskatchewan, other than maybe Desolation National PArk or something. I also remember going through this place in Calgary with my mom, called Heritage Park. It was kind of amuseum from the late part of the nineteenth century, and I got to ride a streetcar and see all sorts of really neat stuff. And, like I said, it brought me much sloser to both of my wonderful parents. I wish i had kept the tape I made of that week.
Honestly... I would return to the moment I was conceived and look at my birthmother and say "hey! What are you thinking??! " I know that sounds strange but I know it would change a lot of things in her life... and I have a strange feeling I would have ended up showing myself somewhere else eventually!
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2007-08-09 03:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-09 03:15 pm (UTC)There are probably many times in my life that I wish I could go back to and do things differently, like the time in high school when I threw a little wimpy guy up against a counter because he called me a name when I was having a bad day; (I did feel really bad later and appologized to him for what I'd done), or when I told a good friend that I didn't want any contact anymore because he was doing drugs, rather than actually trying to talk to him instead. But, if I started wanting to change things I'd be a very busy person. So, now I'm trying to figure out a time that I'd like to go back to because it was incredible. I think that would have been the summer I was 13. I was at the Wisconsin Lion's Camp for two weeks in July, and I got to see a lot of people that I ordinarily didn't get to see. It was the summer between my seventh and eighth grade years, and seventh grade ended on a bad note so I was really truly scared of going back in the fall. After the first week of camp, a new girl was moved into our cabin. I was told ahead of time that she was really shy and that she probably wouldn't talk to us much. So, I pictured this really quiet, timid kid walking in, and the person that actually came in was absolutely nothing like that. She and I hit it off pretty much right away, and we still have an incredible friendship today. But, the part I wish I could do again happened on the last night of camp. Our group had formed a really close bond over the two weeks, and we were all really not looking forward to going back to our homes. My counselor, Sheri, was really a great person, and the counselor for the guy's cabin that we were paired up with, Doug, was also really amazing. So, the last night of camp, we all went to bed as usual, but Sheri woke us up at midnight. She got us all up and we went down to the lake. I think they built a fire and we were all kind of sitting around talking and just being together. Then we split up into groups and went canoeing around the lake. I was really having a hard time that night, partly because of the fact that I was going to be leaving my friends, and partly because the end of camp meant that I was that much closer to going back to school, and the absolute terror of that was something I couldn't then, and still can't now, really begin to express. I can't really explain everything the way I'd like to, because I just can't do it justice, but being with all those people, the peacefulness of the surroundings both on and off the water, and the fact that, for one of the first times in my life, I felt truly accepted by others, without being singled out as being different from everyone else gave me this incredible feeling of peace. After it was all over, I ended up walking back to the cabin with Sheri. She gave me some advice that night, and I still think about it sometimes. She basically told me that I didn't always have to be tough and "strong", and that it was okay to let people get close to me, even if it meant getting hurt once in a while. I lost touch with Sheri several years ago, but I often wonder what ever happened to her. She is only about 7 or 8 years older than me, but at thirteen, twenty or twenty-one seems like a long way off. I wish I could talk to Sheri now, and tell her how much that summer, that night, and our private conversation, meant to me.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-09 03:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-09 03:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-09 03:42 pm (UTC)As for the good times I'd like to relive, there are so many. The one that sticks out the most is a trip my parents and I took to Alberta in, I guess, 1982. It was a wonderful opportunity to get closer to both of them. I remember taking a shower and getting the curtain not quite right, making a huge mess in the bathroom. My dad took me away fromt he hotel before my mom killed me, and we went for a walk in a local park. To this day I'm surprised that we found a park in Saskatchewan, other than maybe Desolation National PArk or something. I also remember going through this place in Calgary with my mom, called Heritage Park. It was kind of amuseum from the late part of the nineteenth century, and I got to ride a streetcar and see all sorts of really neat stuff. And, like I said, it brought me much sloser to both of my wonderful parents. I wish i had kept the tape I made of that week.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-10 01:57 am (UTC)I would return to the moment I was conceived and look at my birthmother and say "hey! What are you thinking??! "
I know that sounds strange but I know it would change a lot of things in her life... and I have a strange feeling I would have ended up showing myself somewhere else eventually!