Bruce Toews

Here I am, back at this question again! That's because as the day goes on, I am realizing what a wonderful, powerful question it is. And thinking back on my response, I want to re-emphasize the idea of thinking very hard about what it is that makes these other people have power over your thoughts. I know it sounds really corny, but to me it boils down to a matter of either giving away your personal power, or retaining it (whether you believe in God or not, it still all comes down to you and your choices). What do these other people have that you want from them, or how are they filling a need that you fear will not be met without catering to their opinions of you? I know that approval is actually a human need--we are social, after all, so seeking approval is part of how we function as a group--but be careful of how much weight you give it, and, maybe most of all, think about what those others gain from making you feel you need their approval. I think maybe I'm not being clear again. I'll leave it alone now, I promise! But great question, relevant to all of us.