Topic for Discussion

[dogriver]

Okay, here's one. What do you do if you suddenly "wake up" to realizing
that the approval of other people has suddenly - or not-so-suddenly -
become more important to you than God's approval? I think even if you
don't believe in God, you might have something valuable to contribute
here, because there is an underlying idea that even transcends faith or
the lack thereof. If you don't believe in God, your question might
simply be, What do you do if you find yourself putting more stock in the
approval of others than you should?

Comments

[masterofmusings.livejournal.com]

In this case, wordiness is good. I need to be hearing everything everyone's been saying. For me, I've come to terms with the fact that this problem exists; I've come to terms with the fact that it's a problem and I don't want to be this way. But the desire for the approval of those around me is so overwhelming ... I don't know how to deal with it. People's stories help me here, just seeing that I'm not alone and that other people have found ways of dealing with this.

[dahlia-and-balu.livejournal.com]

Here I am, back at this question again! That's because as the day goes on, I am realizing what a wonderful, powerful question it is. And thinking back on my response, I want to re-emphasize the idea of thinking very hard about what it is that makes these other people have power over your thoughts. I know it sounds really corny, but to me it boils down to a matter of either giving away your personal power, or retaining it (whether you believe in God or not, it still all comes down to you and your choices). What do these other people have that you want from them, or how are they filling a need that you fear will not be met without catering to their opinions of you? I know that approval is actually a human need--we are social, after all, so seeking approval is part of how we function as a group--but be careful of how much weight you give it, and, maybe most of all, think about what those others gain from making you feel you need their approval. I think maybe I'm not being clear again. I'll leave it alone now, I promise! But great question, relevant to all of us.

[masterofmusings.livejournal.com]

Please don't leave it alone. What the three of you have said so far is valuable and important, and it all contributes greatly to my chewing my way through this one.